The Scourge of the Douche

A horrible scourge has entered the American lexicon and it pains me and my girl parts every single time it’s used. It’s the misuse of the word douche.

douche n. (//) A device used to introduce a stream of water into the body for medical or hygienic reasons, or the stream of water itself.

Douche usually refers to vaginal irrigation, the rinsing of the vagina.

If you have been using the word douche to describe a certain undesirable, mostly jerk-faced, clueless, self important type of man, I cannot help but be insulted at what you’ve been insinuating.  I would never ever ever let the men you are labeling douches anywhere near my vagina, much less allow him to “irrigate” or “rinse” it.

I bet there are more than a few of you creeps that are thinking “Wow, now that you put it like that, being a douche doesn’t sound so bad after all.”

Please, next time you feel the need to call names, ask yourself,  “Is this the kind of thing that I would allow to rinse my vagina, the most sacred of life giving vessels?”  If the answer is no. Please, for heaven’s sake, don’t say it.